Its an oft heard philosophy life often beats you down, pounds you to the ground. Its up to you to pick yourself up and move on. Everyone has to go through that phase at some point or the other. But what about those times, when you felt like just lying down and not getting up? Personally, for me, I have reached that point several times in my life, at different points. I found myself alone, friendless, abandoned, for the lack of a better word. I found out the hard way, that family members are individual human beings too, and they too, get tired at some point or the other. During those times, I cried out for help, and no one showed up. It was like one of those accidents you see on the road. You stop, you look, you comment on how awful the whole thing is, and then you move on, when you could really be helping the guy out. Don't get me wrong, I keep doing the same thing. But, during those times when I found myself nose down on the pavement, and realized that no one is coming for help, I felt like I had nothing to look forward to. There was no reason to get up. After all, what is the point? The people you know think you are dirt anyway. But as I lay there, letting self pity wash over me, it just struck me that I am giving up on a life I can have just because someone else is disappointed in me. I realized that all my life, I have been groomed to live my life the way my parents wanted me to live. I am now 25, turning 26 in a months time. A quarter of my life has gone by, and all I have done is waste my time, trying to please everyone around me. That realization woke me, gave me just that tiny bit of strength to get up.
I was almost finished by the time I did, but before I could collapse again, someone special came into my life. She looked at me with loving eyes, told me she loved me just the way I am, put my arms around her, and lifted me up, and helped me walk again, and finally find myself. This is by no means an advice or a lesson, its just a testimony of what I have been through in my life. All my life, I waited for someone to pick me up, I prayed for strength. But finally, life taught me one of its greatest lessons: when you pray to god for strength, he does not give you strength, but an opportunity to be strong. Once you manage to make that effort and pick yourself up, he steps in and makes sure that you never fall down again.
I like the last part of you never falling again... :P
ReplyDeletedanke :D
ReplyDeletewhere are you??? what happened to your other writings????
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